My Father is moving down to a bottom floor apartment next week and he needs me to help him move.  The truth is, I really don’t want to go.  I’m just so sick of dealing with the associated crap that goes along with maintaining this relationship.  I suppose that going down there is the ‘right’ thing to do…but I’m almost to the point where the ‘right’ thing to do is to stay away.  I’ve dealt with the same BS for almost 40 years now and it simply doesn’t change.  It would be pointless to outline the aforementioned BS but it’s stuff that EVERYONE else in his life has chosen to NOT deal with.  So why should I be any different.  I used to think that if I didn’t help that I would suffer the same fate as he is suffering through now…but the truth is…he put himself in this position and there is no one to blame but himself.  I know I’m not going to be in his position EVER…because I don’t treat people like shyte.  I don’t lie, manipulate and take advantage of people.  I used to judge my siblings because they wouldn’t help him…but perhaps they’re just smarter than I am.

I’m more than likely going down on the 1st.  Which means I’ll have to take off a day or two from work, buy plane tickets, a hotel room.  The whole time I’m sure I’ll be treated just as poorly as I am every other time I go down there.

Fun stuff.  Fuck.

MiH